One of the many problems in trying to maintain a reputable sanatorium is simply the amount of people it takes. I mean one has to take into account first the doctors that provide the medical services, but also guards, cooks, janitors, receptionists, tour guides, grounds keepers, animal trainers, board members, accountants, architects, translators, engineers, electricians, pharmacists, artists, and mad scientists, not to mention the entire patient population. Costs run high and the returns are low. Once in awhile a patient becomes functional again, but then there is always the worry they will randomly amputate an innocent bystander and be sent back, adding the insult of apparently not having cured the person in the first place. And then, of course, is the problem of having the thing named after yourself. Who needs this pressure? Not me, that’s for sure. Just the other day I was assaulted by a man whose mother was sent to the sanatorium for strangling four cats and then hanging them from her clothes line. Apparently this man was very close to his mother, and judging from his demeanor, I have a suspicion that we might be seeing him very soon. Perhaps he and his mother can get adjoining cells. Anyway sorry to burden you with my miseries, but I thought I should let everyone know that it’s no cake walk. Thanks for reading, and may I never have to see your face on the other side of a padded door.

p.s. re: cheryl's guestbook post
well dont feel too bad about the bad info, just remember , peter greenaway doesnt direct crap movies. only good ones. with this in mind you'll never go wrong. also, christine and caroline are coming down soon, so we will all get together and do something. no excuses. :)

Sorry about the long absence of posts, but I was gone for a while and then for a while I did not have access to the internet. Wait. I'm not sorry. You bitches just have to WAIT damnit.
anyway, for a week, ok not really just 5 days, I was in Colorado attending a family reunion. It was fun, got to see many family members in various states of distress. (they all have small children) But here's the thing. Our reunion was at a YMCA camp. An Especially religious YMCA camp (I know the YMCA is a religious organization, but usually its pretty tame)Anyway, for 5 days I was surrounded by freakos.now I don't mean any disrespect to those believers who may read my blog, but these people probably reach sexual climax while reading the bible. Adding to my discomfort was the fact that this camp was at 9000 feet. My sister says there was 43% less oxygen there than at sea level (and since she's lived in Europe, I believe her)so it was difficult to breathe, making it that much harder to run from the guitar wielding Christians (like hell I'm going to a sing along worship service.) at my most desperate, I seriously considered running naked through the woods shouting the praises of some earthy pagan goddess,but luckily it never came to that. Fortunately my relatives never realized just how strange I can be and so we got along fine, I even went white water rafting. (actually I'd say it was a bit more like egg shell rafting. It was kinda tame) but overall I had fun, and a moderate amount of fun is all one can hope for at such a....reverent camp.

i dont think im gonna post about my trip. it was long and boring. ok, so i did post about my trip. there you go. sorry its not too interesting, but im tired and lazy. miles and sandy won't leave me alone. blah. at this moment not may of my friends are here in s. pasadena, so ive just been sitting around watching tv. again, not very interesting, but some time soon ill have a real update. i promise. (sorta) :)
p.s. does cheryl still read my blog? if you are reading this, give me a call! (i hope you still have my number, cause i lost your...haha...sorry..we need to get the ol' gang together and hang out...well as many as we can at least)

I am about to embark on a mystical quest for the magic of the red stones (a.k.a. South Pasadena). I am sure to encounter many dangerous villains, helpful cobblers, and a few +5 elves. I shall relate my journey when it is completed. Or I may not. I haven't decided.

U is for Ukraine

Ken overshot the Ukraine by a few hundred miles on Thursday. He was launched by scientist Dr. Marvin Monroe, who was working in conjunction with the science division of the Eastern European Branch of T.A.G.S.M.S.

What i'm listening to right now: Erlend Øye "Unrest"

So that last post for the letter "T" really sucked, i know. But oh well, i'm just not feeling it right now. watch, i'll try and write one my trademark whimsical poems:

The birds fly through the air
with worms in their teeth
and gel in their hair.
The fly north for the summer;
they would stay south but seriously this global warming shit is just making things too hot and they'd much rather be in cool weather 'cause they get hot and then they sweat and their gel melts and gets sticky.

see? it isn't working like it used to. and believe me, it used to work. oh well. things are alright i guess.i have a crazy teacher for my summer school class, i swear he's on something and there are very credible rumors that he's slept with some students. gross. you know i'm running low on the creative mojo when i start talking about my life in this thing. i go back to South Pasadena on June 1st. I leave at like 6 am and get in to union station in L.A. at about 10pm. a long trip but so much cheaper than flying. (i'm taking amtrak).work is going ok, but i need more hours so i can pay my rent! i think i might work all next week, so thats good. that reminds me, i went to go see "the chronicles of riddick" last week, and it wasn't the soul sucking vapid abortion i thought it would be. ok yeah it was dumb in some parts, and it needed to be shorter and stay with the main plot better (there was this like 45 min. sequence in this prison on a really hot planet, "crematoria", lol, that could have been shortened by a lot.)but anyway, the production design was neat, done by the same guy who did Dark City. Overall it was a fun movie, i'm glad i saw it, and well worth what i paid to see it (which was nothing, haha :), thanks will) there are some movies i want to see this summer, like michael moore's new film, and "young adam" (it has Tilda Swinton!!!! YEA!!!!! )speaking of tilda swinton, i've been having this strange urge to watch "orlando" again. its a really great movie that has been called "the draughtsman's contract of the ninties." now, i wouldn't go that far, cause you all know how i feel about the draughtsman's contract, but "orlando" is still a great film. my sister teresa has netflix so i asked her to put it on her rental list so i can see it when i get down there. :) well thats all for now, i've gone on quite long enough. in fact, i think this is the longest post in which i actually talk about whats going on in my life at the moment. lucky you, you get to read it. i'm so jealous. wait..no i'm not.

p.s. the third harry potter movie is awesome. now i'm not that big of a potter fan, and i stopped reading the books at number three, but the third movie is not just the best harry potter film, its a damn fine film period. go alfonzo curon!

T is for Test.

Ray took a test on some subjects that he really didn't like. so he killed the teacher. blah...

Ten Things I Learned From "Pootie Tang"

10. Don't let the ladies come between you and the belt.
9. Don't talk back to mommity
8. He's dirty 'cause he's Dirty Dee damnit!
7. Sine your pinny on the runny kine.
6. Eat your vegetables and don't drink malt liquor, 'cause you don't have to, 'cause you're ok.
5. Sa-da-tay
4. Just 'cause a girl likes to stand on the street corner next to some whores and dance, doesn't mean she's hoin'.
3. It's hot out. And it's hot too.
2. Oooo, it hurts him to kill a man, but he knows he's got to!
1. You can't beat a ho with a belt, they like that shit!

S is for Satisfaction

Laura cheated on Ray with his brother Charles. Ray demanded satisfaction and challenged Charles to a duel. They both lost, and Laura ended up dating their father.