TRY NOT TO GET WORRIED, TRY NOT TO TURN ON TO PROBLEMS THAT UPSET YOU, OOOOO………..



Writing utensils simply disappear when I’m around. They jump into any hidden crevasse, any dark corner, or any opportunistically placed stacks of paper, absolutely determined not to be used. “I will not be drained and discarded!!!” they shout, while scrambling to the nearest hidey-hole. I suppose they do have cause for fear, for I am inclined to chew on the unused end of the cap while using a pen. But it’s still annoying. If the pencils and pens do not fall in line soon, I shall be forced to impose stricter rules regarding their anthromorphic activities. In other news, I have been busy at work scanning master protocols into the database. (Master protocols are basically descriptions of the study to be performed) one of the more interesting protocols to cross my desk was one entitled “A mulit-center, randomized, double blind, sham controlled trial investigating sub mucosal delivery of radiofrequency energy to the anal canal.” And right beneath this title were three square, small drawings of an anus into one of which had been inserted what can only be described as “Mr. Good Time Johnson” or perhaps “Good Times Jones and the Vibrations” or maybe “The Big Anus Penetrator.” (that last one may be a bit vulgar and crass but it gets the point across to anyone dumb enough not to understand the pervious two). I can only imagine that this instrument is the vehicle that they plan to use to deliver the “radiofrequency energy.” I wonder about the side effects to such a procedure. I would hate to have Star 98.7 or even 89.9 to emit from my ass at the most inopportune time (a society luncheon or while having tea with the duchess of Canterbury). Could one pass it off as indigestion? I think not (although there is a certain pleasure and logic in imagining hearing Britney Spears or any of today’s pop coming out of someone’s rear). In any case, I fear for the participants.
Well I’m afraid that’s all for now, I hope you didn’t read this while eating, or while in the bathroom. Everything else is going fine, same as always.

SLEEP AND I SHALL SOOTHE YOU, CALM YOU AND ANOINT YOU, MYRHH FOR YOUR HOT FORHEAD, OOOOO……….

Work, Work, Work, Grendel, Grendel, Grendel. Thats me these days. "being Grendel in the basement" (TM: sean). Not doing great, not doing bad, gettin' by, wish i could fly, etc....
nothing much new otherwise. I need to get more sleep though, been having a hard time waking up in the morning and ive decided that it's because i dont go to bed till 12. (i'm smart!) and by the way, have any of you read rosie o'donnell's blog? its kinda cryptic and creepy. she writes in what is supposed to be stream of conciousness prose (im guessing) but it reads like the last words of a dying developmentaly disabled child. if that makes any sense. i would link to it, but i already did a link in this post and im too damn lazy. you'll just have to google it yourself. ungrateful bitches!!!.

j/k

p.s. i don't like the cut of your jibb

--TAGSMS

I "heart" Tilda Swinton

APRIL 26, 2005

Blinking Lights and other Revelations

i havent updated in a while, but really, what new things is there to say? School and work goes on everyday, my room gets messy and then i clean it, then it gets messy again, and then i clean it, etc... I'll be in southern california again soon. Thats all for now.

You're Libya!

It seems that these days, you just say things to get attention.
Shock value is the really important thing for you now. You used to have
a cause, and this made you seem like a threat to the established order, but now you
just want to say wacky stuff once in a while. Air travel doesn't really mesh
with your lifestyle, and you'd probably scare the security guards somehow
anyway.
Take
the Country Quiz at the Blue Pyramid

Voting is yummy

The election is only nine days away, and I have to pee. (one of these things is very important. Can you guess which one?) It's an interesting time to be alive. I suppose all times are, and after all, we don't know what's coming so as far as we know in ten years it will be an even more interesting time to be alive and this year will seem quaint. But I digress (and will again soon), The upcoming election is monopolizing the air and radio waves, as well it should, and I find myself trying to avoid programs that consist of endless conjecture about who will win. I can hardly watch "The Daily Show" anymore. It's probably more than just the election I'm tired of. School is becoming boring and repetitive, more than usual that is, and my professors just seem to want to hear themselves talk. What's a high class guy like myself to do? CHEESE!!!!. Every time I watch the news they have pundits spewing forth an endless stream of puss and puss-like substances, which in some circles I guess passes for intelligent discussion. And they always seem to be saying the same thing: "unless you're a straight white attractive and or rich male, you're going to going to be shat upon and then covered with bees that sting you with those bee stingers that bees usually have." It makes me sick. Well its either them or the shots of rum and vodka I had last night. (note: do not make up rule "must take two shots when you pull out a blank jenga block" while playing jenga with alcohol nearby). Anyway, to my point, and I do have one, most of the time life sucks, that is unless you have great friends. I have been lucky enough to have been blessed (humm..don't like that word, to much religiousosity. let's use......."jaabor-ed" yes....jaabor-ed) I have been lucky enough to have been jaabor-ed with a few select, very unique, friends. I don't think I really give them the credit they deserve. Most of my humor, tasteless and otherwise, is often derived from our conversations and their observations about life, liberty and the pursuit of cheese. I know I talk a lot of shit, but my friends ARE the shit. I' m only cool 'cause of them, and I don't care if all this blabering is making me sound like a weak little wet nurse who cries while watching her stories, 'cause my friends kick ass damnit, and I want to be sure that they know it. Life would truly be unbearable if it weren't for you guys (..girls...Undecideds....)
Rock on!


P.S. I have many friends for whom all I said is true, but there are two in particular (you know who you are) that shine as beacons of all that is good about humanity, for you, an extra helping of cheese and another Rock On!


P.P.S. I just checked my fridge, and I'm out of cheese. damn.

I had a dicussion/argument the other day with people at work about artists. i said all artists are self-centered to a certain degree, and this isnt really a bad thing. two other people said that what i said wasnt true and a good artisit can be selfless, and that i was over generalizing. Your Thoughts?? please, record them in my guestbook

My cable bill is addressed to a Mr. Faldana. what the hell. It's personal when someone really Fucks up your name like that. I have enough trouble with people mis-pronouncing my name already without these Fuckers getting the entire First letter wrong (not just part of the First letter, the whole damn thing) What is wrong with these people? Perhaps i should just skip out on the First bill and say, "well i never got a bill. no, im not Mr. Faldana" Goddamn Cocks Cable (Cox Cable)